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Friday, August 6, 2010

How To Handle With Frustrations

Sunday 4th of July, 2010 was a glorious day. We had a great time in the presence of God as we watched the women handle the church service climaxing their National Convention. Getting back Justify Fullhome we had so much to share together. My wife took time to feed baby, after which she slept. That gave us some space to take care of a few things with regards to our trip to Uyo, Nigeria the following day.

A few minutes later she woke up and that with a scream. We thought it was a normal wake up blues but were shocked beyond measure as we realised this was beyond normal. We did everything we could but she wouldn’t stop. More than an hour had passed yet my baby was nowhere near consolation. Carrying her, I was asking her what the problem was. She could only look at me and cry some more. I was so frustrated. At that moment I wished my baby could speak to me. I guess it would have been very strange for a four months old baby to speak but I wouldn’t have cared. I just needed clues.

My wife had asked me to pray for baby and we did. We prayed again and again but baby was really screaming. I left them in the room and came to the sitting room where I was ironing a few clothes. Standing before the ironing board, I began to scream, pouring my frustrations to God. I couldn’t take it any longer. I knew no reason why she should be crying that way and the One who knows why would have to do something about it or tell us what to do.

Somehow, I felt the need to bind any strange force afflicting my baby and that I did with very strong passion. Moments later I didn’t hear her voice again. My wife brought her to the sitting room and I noticed the screaming had reduced drastically. We wanted to go to the hospital but noticed she was really calming down and then it stopped and started to eat. A little while later she slept and that was the end of that shocking encounter.

Why Frustration?

The following morning while I was praying, I began to understand the reason behind frustration. I saw that lack of understanding leads to frustration. We couldn’t understand why our baby was screaming and so we were frustrated. Baby possibly wanted us to understand what was bordering her but there was communication breakdown. She couldn’t speak our language and we didn’t understand hers. And so frustration set it. Thank God who can understand the language of children and what a wonderful thing He did! He consoled her and put an end to our misery.
Delay can also be another formidable reason for frustration. No one actually likes delay. We want what we want when we want it. This is fostered by the times we live in. Ours is a generation of quick fix. Computers and other technological products have helped us reduce so much time required for many things. We don’t like to wait for anything. So when there is a delay, frustration sets in.

How to Handle Frustration

Be Calm
This is always difficult to do when you have a very frustrating situation but if you can do it, it will enable you to overcome the situation. Speaking through the Psalmist, God said, "Be still and know that I am God." That day I just kept quiet. Initially, I didn't know what to do and it will foolish to try to do something when you don't know what to do. Calmness helps you know what to do. Anxiety dissipates energy. That's why you can't be productive when you are under anxiety.

Take it to God
It is important we take our challenges and difficult issues to God. This is because He has perfect understanding of all things. He speaks and understands all languages and is all-powerful, so He’s aptly qualified to handle anything confronting us. We need to pray always for understanding and insight into issues because we can’t solve a problem we don’t understand. That’s why Solomon insisted on us getting understanding. He knew that life will be a bundle of frustration when you can’t understand your assignment in life and the challenges facing you.

The Power of Understanding

Understanding, among many other things will give you confidence.
When you understand a problem, you can confidently handle it. You can’t be afraid of a person or a challenge you understand. Confidence is the key to victory. It releases boldness. It gives you a winning edge. It enables you to handle your challenges calmly and surely. Confidence, according to Microsoft Encarta, is self assurance or a belief in your ability to succeed. It was confidence that made Paul to declare, “If God be for us who can be against us”. With such confidence, no wonder he was a great success. Confidence is the key to success and it draws it strength from understanding.

Secondly, understanding gives direction. When you understand a problem you can move confidently in the right direction and solve it. Direction is vital if we must win the battles of life. Direction means sense of purpose. Without a sense of purpose failure is inevitable. Nothing was created without purpose and when purpose is not known, Myles Munroe says, abuse is inevitable.

Again understanding provides security.
We can only secure a destiny we understand. Without understanding there is no security. Many people give away their lives for nothing because they lack understanding. There are many things you won’t do when you understand who you are and what you are supposed to do with your life.

Next, understanding provides peace and joy. Lasting peace and joy is a function of understanding. There are many things that want to steal your peace and drain your joy but when you understand the situation then you don’t have anything to fear. You can relax and be rest assured of victory.

Finally, understanding leads to promotion. Your promotion in life will be tied to your level of understanding. The more you understand your purpose in life and pursue it the more greatness you will enjoy.